What Is The Virtue And Vice Of INFJs? Integrity Vs. Corruption

Transcript:

00:00 hey guys it's CS Joseph at CSJoseph dot 00:03 life we've been talking about virtue and 00:06 vice the last couple of lectures and 00:10 tonight we're gonna be continuing that 00:12 series on with the next and final type 00:15 of the see it through chart the course 00:17 types tonights type is the sage the infj 00:22 last night we did the INTJ and virtue 00:28 and vice in terms of the INTJ 00:31 i mean we say it was trust in paranoia 00:33 and yes INFJs do share and trust in 00:36 paranoia but it's not a primary virtue 00:39 advice INFJs have a different virtue and 00:43 vice for them so let's kind of dive into 00:47 that i'm not sure if this lecture will 00:49 be just as long as the INTJ but I'll 00:52 give it my best because the infj virtue 00:56 advice is the number one requested video 00:59 that I have right now so I'm gonna do my 01:02 best for you guys here so even though 01:04 it's like super dark out past dusk etc 01:08 so yeah if you can't see it's fine but 01:12 at least you can hear me right 01:13 so hopefully this stabilizer thing works 01:17 trying to get rid of some of the shake 01:20 when I'm walking around outside and 01:23 whatnot or at least when I film while I 01:25 go hiking 01:25 so anyway virtue and vice so a little 01:32 bit of background actually I want to go 01:33 give a little bit of background about 01:35 where this virtual advice came from so 01:39 when I was learning under my mentor 01:42 Robert D Bryant and the mentor after him 01:46 RP Morial I we had discussed virtue 01:52 advice at length a few times to be 01:54 honest I owe all the credit for the idea 01:57 to mr. Bryant he came up with the 02:02 original blueprint for the idea of 02:04 virtue and vice 02:06 and he taught it to me and well he 02:09 believes some of the initial types were 02:10 but honestly it didn't really become 02:12 refined without more life experience and 02:16 also going to my second mentor RP Morial 02:18 it was an infj and he fleshed out the 02:21 theory a little bit more for me from 02:25 there especially after speaking to him 02:28 about mr. Bryant's point of view so I 02:31 was able to take the theory beyond both 02:33 of them and develop it further but this 02:37 one I have to say this virtue and vice 02:40 for the sake of you know just INF days 02:44 in general really comes from mr. Morel 02:47 and this is coming from an actual infj 02:52 who's not miss type who's not an INFP 02:55 miss type which it's kind of interesting 02:57 a lot of the people complaining about 03:00 about my infj video or actually mistyped 03:04 infps thinking that their JS which if 03:08 you think about it it's actually 03:09 technically true why is that because the 03:12 INFP type has fi hero which is a 03:17 decision-making judging cognitive 03:21 function right so it makes sense that 03:24 infps would feel like they're actually j 03:26 types when in reality they're not 03:28 whereas and i well i mean they are in 03:31 socionics let's be honest but outside of 03:38 socionics if you going to MBTI right 03:42 you're trying to stay true to MBTI well 03:44 it's a little bit more complicated 03:46 because in MBTI you have a perceiving 03:51 hero introverted intuition for INFJs yet 03:54 they're considered a j-type right where 03:57 does the j type actually come from in 03:59 terms of MBTI oh it really comes from 04:01 whether or not you have an extroverted 04:04 judging function as in the top two slots 04:08 of your ego basically on top two slots 04:10 your cognitive functions then your a 04:12 j-type or whatever right well not 04:16 exactly the most 04:17 accurate thing in the world you know you 04:20 we try I mean we try to we try our best 04:26 to be as accurate as possible with that 04:27 but that's not always the case right 04:29 it's just not always the case in 04:31 socionics like an INFP is actually in 04:36 the MBTI is version of an infj 04:38 right so it gets a little confusing and 04:41 I can and I understand I understand why 04:43 infps often mistyped themselves as infj 04:46 it's this phenomenon they see themselves 04:49 as too sick as decision-makers right and 04:53 so they because they feel that they are 04:55 more judgmental or not really judgmental 04:58 they're more prone to making judgments 05:00 in making decisions they feel that they 05:02 should be considered INFJs and that's 05:04 why when they take the test they end up 05:06 getting infj instead of INFP which is 05:10 funny you know because infps are 05:12 actually sensitive to criticism well you 05:14 can't think that about me that's crap 05:16 you know you don't even know what you're 05:18 talking about you know and what cite 05:21 your sources what is your reference 05:22 material you know ok yeah sure I get it 05:25 but seriously infps realize that you may 05:30 be mistyping yourselves as an infj and 05:33 be based on that I recommend you watch 05:35 the INFP video and the infj video at the 05:38 same time right so you could tell the 05:41 difference right kind of make it'll help 05:44 you make a distinction that's important 05:46 when we're considering virtue and vice 05:47 for the infj and I will get to the INFP 05:50 eventually it's actually going to be the 05:52 final lecture in this series that I'll 05:54 be doing but let's but let's actually 05:56 talk about that so what is the virtue in 06:00 Vice my infj mentor taught me it because 06:05 it came from a concept that he 06:09 enlightened me on one day and that 06:10 concept was the concept of the mirror 06:13 right the mirror and INFJs have this 06:17 thing where they're like mirrors right 06:20 they mirror people's behavior that is 06:22 around them you know they allow other 06:23 people around them to kind of set the 06:25 tone or set the behavior the social tone 06:29 the social behavior the social 06:30 conscience 06:31 the social boundaries right the social 06:33 walls right for which they can operate 06:36 in it's kind of like INFJs they need 06:38 freedom to operate in but they also kind 06:40 of like to have a box or boundaries or 06:43 walls around them built so they know 06:45 where their limitations are that way 06:46 they can always feel good because if 06:48 there are no limitations they feel like 06:50 they're at risk they're at risk of you 06:53 know doing the wrong thing right if you 06:55 give them full freedom then all of a 06:57 sudden if they make a decision well it's 06:59 like and then you don't like it then all 07:01 of a sudden it's like well you never 07:03 told me that right you never told me if 07:06 that was the case you you know you 07:08 didn't say that that would be a problem 07:09 you know how how am I supposed to know 07:11 the difference the infj would say right 07:13 so that makes sense that makes perfect 07:16 sense and this is why when I'm in a 07:18 relationship with an infj or they're my 07:21 friends I set boundaries with them just 07:23 so that they understand where those 07:25 boundaries are and then they don't cross 07:27 them and because they don't cross those 07:28 boundaries we can have a really good 07:30 relationship right of course I 07:32 understand there's the boundary of 07:33 loyalty and their need for loyalty and I 07:35 also need to give them their day in 07:36 court especially their TI child and 07:38 actually listen to them that's important 07:41 too and of course I do that when I'm in 07:42 a relationship with them especially an 07:44 intimate relationship with them but it 07:48 all comes down to boundaries well that's 07:50 the thing about mirrors 07:51 you know sometimes like if someone's 07:53 behaving badly the infj gets the idea 07:55 that okay well if you're behaving badly 07:57 I have license to behave badly now you 08:00 know and kind of give you the same 08:02 behavior that you're giving me back 08:03 right it's the infj is like literally 08:07 that type of person that you know I mean 08:10 if you're being a horrible person they 08:12 will be it they'll they will start to 08:13 believe it's okay for them to be a 08:15 horrible person right back at you 08:17 you know it's because they like to see 08:19 themselves as the ultimate reactive 08:21 force that that person that is going to 08:24 be reacting to you and your behavior 08:27 right I mean that's just kind of how 08:29 they see it 08:30 it's really not much you could do about 08:32 that so why is this well it's the mirror 08:36 effect our P Morial taught me about the 08:39 mirror effect and how extroverted 08:41 sensing inferior in conjunction with FE 08:44 parent 08:44 really creates this mirror effect and 08:47 the mirror basically is is that INFJs 08:50 mirror the behavior of other people that 08:54 they are around and well why is that 08:59 well it's because they want to be they 09:02 really want to be accepted by those 09:04 people around them 09:05 and if they can't lead the social order 09:08 in that particular situation if you 09:10 can't beat them I may as well join them 09:12 right and that's where that comes from 09:14 that's where that ends up becoming a 09:17 thing right or a risk for INFJs they're 09:23 all about mirroring behavior and if 09:25 you're in a relationship with an infj 09:26 and they're being horrible to you maybe 09:30 you should check yourself first right 09:31 check to make sure that you're not the 09:34 one who's being horrible first in their 09:36 eyes like literally go up to them and 09:39 ask them for criticism I'm sorry but 09:41 they have t.i child because they're 09:43 really good thinkers INFJs hardened they 09:47 have no issue criticizing anybody they 09:50 have no issue I especially if asked like 09:52 if you go out tonight and actually like 09:53 criticize me tell me what you think of 09:55 me is there something wrong you know 09:57 it's there they will tell you and 09:58 they'll be blunt sometimes you know of 10:01 course they'll try to let you down easy 10:02 but then that bluntness that t.i 10:04 innocent child will just come out and 10:07 logic you to death right there's not 10:10 much you can do about that you just have 10:12 to take it as it comes you have to you 10:15 have to accept it it's important that 10:17 you accept that about them because the 10:20 t-i child needs to stay in court always 10:22 give the TI child's day in court so the 10:26 mirror effect they Mir other people's 10:29 behavior and this mirror is actually the 10:32 cause or the foundation between the axis 10:35 of their virtue and their vice right 10:38 that's why it's important so let's talk 10:42 about that the virtue of the infj is 10:46 integrity and the vise is corruption 10:50 so integrity versus corruption 10:55 I gotta be honest with you out of all 10:57 the types there is no type that 11:00 represents integrity like an infj for 11:05 example when I was 10 when I was 10 11:10 years old I had a friend from church he 11:12 was an infj he was an adult he was 11:14 actually one of my dad's really good 11:17 friends 11:18 very awesome man we're playing this old 11:21 game on a bulletin board a BBS back in 11:25 the day I connected to it with World 11:27 Group manager on Windows 95 you know 11:29 what I mean and we're playing this game 11:32 this text-based mud called trade Wars 11:34 2002 and it's a spaceship game basically 11:38 it's just like EVE Online it's just like 11:40 star citizen you know that's all of 11:43 those games from this genre I came from 11:44 trade Wars 2002 right well we played 11:47 this game and my friend his name is 11:50 Lawrence may he rest in peace he he was 11:57 part of a corporation which are 11:58 basically like guilds right part of a 12:00 corporation in the game and the CEO of 12:02 the corporation well he was a systems 12:04 operator for the trade wars game he 12:07 actually had the ability to run 12:08 something called T edit and give himself 12:11 all the weapons and all the money in the 12:13 game right well one day my friend 12:16 Lawrence caught him doing this caught 12:18 him giving himself actual resources on 12:22 fairly in the game right and he 12:24 immediately quit the corporation he 12:26 immediately meant went public about it 12:28 and said this is crap I'm not going to 12:30 allow this to happen this is literally 12:32 cheating you're destroying the game you 12:34 know this is unfair to everybody else 12:36 you know it's a it's definitely not 12:40 something he would have been okay with 12:41 right well he wasn't so he quit and the 12:47 rest of the players in the game 12:48 appreciate it because we had no idea of 12:50 this kind of abuse right 12:51 that's what's so awesome about high nfj 12:54 integrity is that TI child has a way of 12:58 exposing lies that has a way of exposing 13:01 abuse it's fantastic why well because 13:05 they lead the way with their integrity 13:07 they 13:08 really where their integrity on their 13:10 sleeve it goes down to their fi critic I 13:14 get that I've taught that you know okay 13:16 yeah if I critic that's super high moral 13:18 standard can alienate people but that's 13:20 super high moral standard that I enough 13:23 J's have can lead to the greatest 13:25 integrity this world has ever seen to 13:27 the point where it is life-changing 13:30 absolutely life-changing where they can 13:34 lead by example with their integrity and 13:37 the entire movement start right Gandhi 13:39 is a perfect example of how virtuous the 13:43 infj can get because his integrity was 13:46 unmatched same thing goes with Jesus 13:49 Christ 13:49 another infj where his integrity was 13:53 unmatched and he started a movement that 13:55 is still alive to this day right so 13:59 that's how powerful infj integrity can 14:04 be it is incredible what they can 14:08 accomplish what they can go through for 14:11 the sake of doing the right thing for 14:13 the sake of representing the good and 14:15 being the avatar of the good right 14:18 because they want to become the ideal 14:20 right because they're idealists and if 14:23 they are not true to themselves with 14:25 their t i child if they're not true to 14:27 their own moral standards for themselves 14:29 even that sometimes the risk we're at 14:31 alienates people right well then the 14:35 whole world around them will come 14:36 crashing down at for example I had 14:39 another example of a infj very close 14:42 infj friend today actually came to me 14:44 about some concerns about GDP are and 14:47 how they how she was just not interested 14:50 in running certain IT systems anymore 14:54 because she was concerned it was 14:56 violating the upcoming law for GDP our 14:58 and she wasn't gonna do it anymore and 15:00 so you know what she did she quit 15:01 because she thought that the system that 15:05 was in place at this organization was 15:08 going to be violating people's privacy 15:10 right again they were willing to go that 15:13 far they're willing to sacrifice 15:15 themselves for the greater good because 15:18 of their integrity because they can't 15:21 live with 15:21 selves without this you know without 15:25 being this display of integrity right so 15:30 but it would be nice if they're always 15:32 so integral right and then it comes 15:36 their vice corruption so where does the 15:43 vice of corruption actually come from 15:45 how how does it actually manifest it's 15:49 actually very simple it comes down to 15:52 loneliness loneliness is the fastest way 15:56 to get the infj to engage the corruption 15:59 when INFJs get lonely and when they're 16:05 alone and they're not Arendt they end up 16:06 trying to have relationships with well 16:09 let's say less savory folk or people of 16:11 lower quality will say and why is this 16:15 well it's because like for example some 16:21 INF days don't really have any choice 16:22 let's say they moved to a really rural 16:24 area or they're in a city or what 16:26 doesn't matter where they are but 16:27 they're just not really able to breathe 16:29 you're around quality people for 16:31 whatever reason I knew an infj that grew 16:35 up on the street I knew another infj 16:36 that that spent couchsurfing for the 16:40 time that they are 10 years old at the 16:42 time they are 24 right that's all they 16:45 ever knew for 14 years 16:47 that's how rough it can get out there 16:49 and if that's all they ever know and the 16:53 people that they've been around or so 16:55 low quality right it corrupts them why 16:57 is that well remember INFJs are mirrors 17:00 if you put a mirror around low quality 17:04 people that mirror is going to reflect 17:07 low quality because they are mirrors se 17:11 inferior absorbs the experience and the 17:13 environment around them Fe parent 17:15 absorbs the social rules of social 17:18 constructs or the people around them and 17:20 they become the people around them to 17:23 the point where they're willing to do 17:25 drugs all of a sudden to the point where 17:27 they're willing to have illicit sex all 17:28 the sudden to the point where they're 17:33 willing to just be as 17:35 to to lack integrity entirely that's the 17:40 problem that is the problem where 17:43 they're willing to give up their 17:45 integrity either because their integrity 17:47 isn't fully formed because they haven't 17:49 been able to mirror the right people 17:50 have the right mentors have the right 17:52 role models right I'll be honest my 17:54 mentor RP Morial he didn't exactly have 17:58 the best kind of Mentors 18:00 he didn't exactly have the best kind of 18:01 role models so he had to figure it out 18:04 all in his own right and because of that 18:07 he developed what I call overactive ti 18:10 child where he ends up alienating people 18:14 because they're not reaching his high 18:16 moral standard or because this ti child 18:18 just absolutely has to be right all the 18:21 time no matter what and he comes off as 18:25 this arrogant prick but that's not 18:29 really his intention his intention is 18:31 just to tell the truth that doesn't mean 18:33 he's a bad person I love him dearly 18:36 although to be honest you know our 18:43 relationships have taken the turn for 18:45 the worst in the past and I'll admit it 18:46 and I regret that but you know there's 18:50 not much I can do about that other than 18:52 just be like yeah you know he was my 18:54 friend he was my mentor I love him and I 18:56 appreciate him and no desire to ever 19:00 betray him and never take credit for his 19:02 work it's good man so situations like 19:08 that integrity is important but 19:12 seriously if an infj gets into a group 19:15 of bad people they will become just like 19:19 the bad people they will seriously 19:22 become just like the bad people and 19:25 there's not very much they can do other 19:29 than get out of the way get away from 19:32 the bad people and they will no longer 19:33 have that problem right that's what it 19:36 means that's what it's all about is 19:38 getting away from those people that's 19:42 when her ever meets the road 19:45 virtue and vice integrity versus in 19:48 corruption there was another example I 19:51 was gonna say what was it when infj is 19:58 you know they could they could start out 20:00 not having those role models and yes 20:02 that can hurt their integrity or there 20:05 could be INFJs who have all the 20:07 integrity in the world but then end up 20:09 in situations where they're completely 20:12 lacking completely lacking in in support 20:18 over time and then they end up seeking 20:20 out relationships with lower quality 20:22 people because those are the people 20:23 available to them and then they start 20:25 mirroring them and then they become 20:27 corrupted and you know that mirror 20:29 something that's really interesting 20:31 about that mirror this is something a 20:33 term that's very important and I would 20:35 like to make this distinction right now 20:36 there is an old saying called damaged 20:40 goods right let me tell you something 20:43 about the infj mirror that infj mirror 20:45 when it is corrupted by being around and 20:48 mirroring low-quality corrupted people 20:51 that mirror starts to corrupt and it 20:53 starts to get cracks in it and it takes 20:55 a long time to repair that mirror so 20:58 that even when the infj has left those 21:00 people those people are door slammed and 21:02 no longer in their life the infj will 21:05 carry on that corruption for a long time 21:08 until they get healing and that healing 21:11 takes a lot they need to be around 21:13 people who are good people who have high 21:18 moral fiber people who are ethical 21:20 people who actually care about them and 21:22 care about their fellow man people that 21:25 long for the idealism that the infj 21:27 represents right then the infj can get 21:31 healing and slowly over time that that 21:33 mirror of theirs that mirror the cracks 21:36 will start to heal they will start to be 21:39 fixed and then they can go back to being 21:42 the most integral person and have the 21:45 highest integrity of anyone else in our 21:47 species the miracle of the infj it's why 21:52 this integrity is why they are the tip 21:54 of the spear which I know triggers some 21:56 people when I say that but I don't care 21:58 because INFJs are the drivers of social 22:03 change infps may provide the vision same 22:06 thing with enfps the vision behind 22:07 social change but it's the NF J's that 22:10 implement it it's the NF J's that drive 22:14 it and it's because of the virtue of the 22:18 infj integrity that is why it is 22:20 possible do not forget this so if you're 22:25 in a relationship with an infj how you 22:27 keep them in their virtue of integrity 22:30 well it's pretty easy 22:32 it's called being integral yourself have 22:35 integrity yourself do what you say mean 22:39 what you say and be consistent if you 22:42 are consistent in your behavior the SE 22:44 inferior or SES / aspirational depending on 22:48 what stage the inferior functions in the 22:51 eye naturally will lock on to you and it 22:53 will borrow your self-discipline and 22:56 they will mirror your behavior they will 22:59 use you as a blip blueprint basically if 23:02 you want to inspire them to have the 23:04 highest integrity possible you need to 23:08 have a high moral standard you need to 23:10 have integrity yourself you need to be a 23:12 role model and a mentor in that way and 23:15 lead by example and the infj will take 23:18 up your example like a flag and they 23:20 will go over every mountain and conquer 23:22 every hill every mountain every obstacle 23:24 in life every mulberry tree and rip out 23:27 the bitter roots of life that lead to 23:30 bad behavior and they will have 23:32 integrity and they will take that 23:34 integrity in the same way that their 23:36 Mirror can get broken and corrupted over 23:38 time that mirror can be reinforced with 23:41 integrity and they could take it for a 23:42 long time and have those personal 23:44 standards and really drive the social 23:46 change that we all long for such as the 23:51 way of integrity versus corruption INFJs 23:57 if you recognize that you're in a 24:00 situation where you may believe that 24:03 you're corrupted and you're lacking 24:05 integrity there is a way there's a way 24:08 to solve that problem let me tell you 24:09 how to do it right now 24:11 get the losers out of your life 24:16 seriously have self-respect if these 24:20 people do not have self-respect you're 24:22 not going to have self-respect so 24:23 instead have self-respect get these 24:26 people out of your life so that you too 24:28 can have self-respect move on from them 24:33 if they're not good to themselves 24:35 they're definitely not going to be good 24:37 to you remember the concept of what 24:38 Jesus and infj said love your neighbor 24:41 as yourself 24:42 you cannot love anyone unless you love 24:46 yourself first you can't love yourself 24:48 unless you're being responsible and 24:50 taking care of your own needs or you 24:52 have personal standards which is the 24:54 standard that you hold yourself to so 24:56 that you can take care of your own needs 24:58 or if you have personal boundaries right 25:00 the standards that you hold other people 25:03 to that's personal boundaries so that 25:05 you don't allow any other human being to 25:07 get in the way of you meeting your own 25:09 needs one of your needs is to have the 25:11 highest integrity you a human being 25:13 could possibly have 25:14 that's your virtue and then after that 25:17 you could develop personal goals and 25:18 then all of a sudden you know yourself 25:20 remember know thyself that's what that 25:23 means I in fj's get the losers out of 25:27 your life move on from these people if 25:29 you're in a bad abusive relationship 25:31 move on I know it's scary 25:33 I know it's lonely out there but you 25:36 have to let these abusive parasitic 25:39 people out of your life you have to move 25:41 on I get that your number one export is 25:44 to make people better but some people 25:46 can't be saved because they are choosing 25:48 not to be saved how many people on the 25:51 street I used to be homeless how many 25:53 people on the street are choosing to be 25:55 on the street willfully choosing instead 25:58 of taking responsibility meeting their 26:00 own needs right and you're wasting your 26:02 life with these people stop doing it 26:04 move on if you do not want to be 26:08 corrupted you have to have self-respect 26:10 you have to move on you have to get 26:12 these people out of your life get the 26:14 losers out of your life and you will be 26:16 successful 26:17 surround yourself with people who are 26:19 intelligent people who are rational 26:22 people who are moral people who give you 26:25 the 26:25 freedom to do whatever you want people 26:26 who are so comforted because you are 26:30 around them I know I'm comforted when 26:33 INFJs are around me I really appreciate 26:35 INF J's I love them the world is not 26:40 complete without you but the world is 26:43 never going to become complete if you're 26:45 wasting your time on low-quality people 26:47 and allowing these people to corrupt you 26:49 instead of leading social change with 26:53 your integrity please 26:56 remember who you are remember why you're 26:59 here the world's not going to change 27:02 without you you need to have the 27:06 integrity no one else is gonna do it 27:11 it's all on you guys that social change 27:16 is waiting the Gandhis the the yesh was 27:22 of life of our race it's all about 27:28 integrity so shy away from the 27:32 corruption for all of our sakes if you 27:39 found this lecture useful helpful 27:41 educational please subscribe to the 27:44 channel here on youtube or on our 27:46 podcast or both 27:47 leave a like as well that'd be dope if 27:49 you have any questions about INF JS or 27:51 their virtue and vice please leave it in 27:52 the comment section and I will do my 27:54 best to answer the comment I read every 27:57 comment that I get takes me sometimes 28:00 two hours a day to go through but I will 28:01 get to them eventually thank you all for 28:03 your patience my next video is going to 28:06 be on the is fj-4 virtue and vice and 28:10 after the virtue and vice a series that 28:13 we're doing right now 28:13 we're going to be doing we're going to 28:15 start getting into compatibility of the 28:17 types and also I will be doing more type 28:20 comparison videos I haven't forgot about 28:22 you guys who've been asking for it I 28:24 will get that to you very soon thank you 28:26 for your patience I only have over 400 28:31 more videos to go right the list keeps 28:34 growing every day 28:36 so with all that sounds good I'll see 28:39 you guys tonight  

 

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C. S. Joseph

Founder, CEO - CSJ.life

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